Despite being on vacation from work, I have definately replaced that with many other things. I've done debate, walked to the post office, read a book outside in the rain, done more debate, cleaned, set up my bookshelf, did more debate, went to yesterday's books with two awesome friends, watched some of Betty Dali's shows from the early 80's, did some more debate, and ate sometimes, and read more, and more debate, and more thinking, and more nothingness, and more and more and more nothingness.
I am so tired of not being able to live the way I want to, but I know that will never completely change. My world lacks peace. I want to live more fully and I can't, my world is frustrated by the human desires that plague me. I want to sell everything. I want to be a hermit, I want to live in the country I want to sing to children I want to hold my own children I want so much that it seams like it will never be and my life seams like it will never begin, and yet it has begun and I have missed the first three chapters and they will never be recovered. I am not content to live a complacent life, yet I know no other and it frustrates me.
Close my eyes and hold my heart, cover me and make me something. Change this something normal into something beautiful. Give me reason to believe you'd never leave me incomplete. Do you see it one my face, that all I can think about is how long, I've been waiting to feel you move me? ~ Jars of Clay-Something Beautiful
1 comment:
Only GOD can give you want you want! ask Him in your pray!
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